Thursday, August 21, 2008

Yay fraud and Cell phone contracts

Well friends today has been a gem of a day. It turns out that somehow , somewhere out there in the great wide world , my credit card number "somehow" got into the bad guys hands. The bad guys being those that will drain your account, take out credit cards in your name AND open bank accounts in your name etc.

So after an interesting converstaion with my bank , I discover that not only can they NOT give me any information as to what merchant let my card number get stolen, they can't really tell me anything except that they need to change my number. So I ask "bank worker" my really obvious question. One that I think most would ask because well, its obvious and a NO BRAINER.

" How do I prevent this from happening again if you can't tell me what merchant my card was compromised from?" She stammers, then stutters and then as honestly as she can says" That is a really good question, er..well. I am sorry maam I don't have an answer to that question for you" The shock in her voice was astonishing because I cannot fathom that I am the first person ever to ask my fraud protection dept. " How can I prevent this?" So she then says" can I help you with anything else?" Can you hear my stunned silence? I blink and say" Hello?" because surely she can't be serious. No offer to find someone to answer my question? No manager? Nope. Turns out my question is so original that I don't get an answer.

So it turns out that not only do I have to be worried about crooks and thieves but now I am terrified at the lack of knowledge that the people who are "protecting" me have. Needless to say, if you want something done, do it your damn self.

On to the next gripe. Our cell phone company is awful. It is criminal that they can assess you arbitrary fees to the tune of hundreds of dollars per line simply because they want to. Its criminal and lucky for them I have no problem saying exactly what I feel. Phone call tomorrow pending. Not a happy Mrs. F. today.

I am happy about the fact that I started my cookbook. Writing recipes is cathartic for me. I hope to publish at some point so it is likely that the recipes I post in this blog won't be in the actual cookbook because who would buy a cookbook that is free on the web?! So my intent with the cooking blog is to just share recipes and get feedback as well as post recipes sent to me by friends and family.

The kids are doing well, they are excited to start school. So many new things this year and I am excited as well. To see Sketch suddenly love to read is such a sweet memory. There have been those that have been such a source of negativity in regards to our homeschooling, they quiz the children, put them on the spot and make them uncomfortable only to somehow prove to themselves that the children are somehow uneducated and lacking. So to watch their daily progress always does my heart good.

I could go and on about similar stories from homeschooling families that encounter this type of thing too. It's as if by doing something outside the box it threatens those that are inside that box. So much so that they feel the need attack your decisions and methods in order to justify their own decisions. It's uncomfortable for me to encounter these people simply because I don't look at someone else or another family and pass judgement of any kind. Namely because its not my family but also because I tend to focus on my world and let others tend to theirs. I have never thought to push my beliefs on others in regards to how they raise their children or how they educate them. Or how they raise them at all because the long and short of it is, I don't know their whole situation.

What I mean to say is people tend to let people know what they wish them to know. Or what they feel comfortable letting them in on. So to expect that I know their situation would just make me foolish.

It's like the people who glare at the moms in the check out line because her child is throwing a righteous tantrum and she loses her temper and says " shut up" or She does nothing at all. What if she gave into the childs demands. You can just hear the gasps of disapproval. Or worse she grabs the child by the arm and hauls them out of the store with the child barely in tow. No one can say that is the best way to handle the situation but being a parent I can identify with the level of frusteration that comes with losing your temper. It happens. I don't see that woman as anything but a tired mom with a child who is probably even more tired. What if that mom has something awful going on and she is just trying to keep it together? It doesn't mean she is an awful mom or person only that she didn't handle the situation well. What would it mean to that mom to have someone come up to her and say something kind?

I think the same thinking applies in all aspects of dealing with other people and families. We generally don't know what goes on in someone elses family and judgement and conjecture really only tell more about those judging that those being judged.
So often I think kindness is set aside in lieu of something hurtful. People tell themselves that it's ok because I am right and they are wrong but in the end that comes down to perspective. I try to keep in mind that while might disagree with anothers choices or decisions, it doesn't mean they are wrong. Just different. I wonder why its so hard to let people be different. It's really not that scarey. Not to me. I enjoy my different family, they are bright spots in what might be an otherwise dreary life. My children are everything I ever hoped they would be and more. My husband is more wonderful to me each day. What an amazing thing to create a family.

I feel very blessed to be in a country that allows me the freedom to have my family and make decisions regarding that with very little interference. I feel very blessed to have the life I do. I feel very blessed to be in a country where I have options regarding my childrens education . Its all about free agency and how lucky we are to have it.

No idea where this tangent came It is probably from a story a friend of mine told about some of the things she was going through and I could really identify with her. So, sorry if its off topic and meandering.

Until next time.
Mrs. F.

ps. I want to send healing vibes to my sister in law who is currently dealing with some rough health issues. We love you and you are in our prayers. If we can do anything don't hesitate to call.


Debra said...

Wow. That really sucks. I have some information that I can email you about next steps with credit fraud/identity theft. It sounds really stressful what you're going through! I have read somewhere recently that some companies had credit card #s stolen from them some way or another and didn't report those thefts to the people involved. It sounds like this may be something that happened to you, and that sucks. I don't know what you can do about that specifically either.

As far as home schooling and other kinds of rude critiques that people put out there, I feel like I have a pretty fair understanding of where those come from. People mock/criticize what they don't understand.

My husband was home schooled for a number of years with some extended family. And the way things are going in public schools these days, I am considering home schooling myself when I have kids- so I might be coming to you with a lot of questions. :)

Also, thanks for the positive vibes & thoughts. I keep waiting for things to get better and am hoping that one day soon they will. I had high hopes for my last doctor (about a year ago), but he really didn't help at all.

Mrs.Flabby and Unfabulous said...

you know Debra I am here for you any time you need. Scott and I love you guys dearly and anything we can do to help we will. Thank you for your nice words and the email is GREAT! What we are going through is nothing compared to what you are. We are praying for you and want you to know we carry you and hubby in our thoughts constantly.
I love you

Freddie said...

I think it's awesome that you're homeschooling your kids. And you have the an excellent mindset as to what what "others" may think.

Live and let live, as they say.

Mrs.Flabby and Unfabulous said...

so good to hear from you freddie. Tell me whats up on your part of the world.